Sunday, January 29, 2017
Day 13: :SPECIAL EDITION: Resident Evil: The Final Chapter (2017) 1h 46m
Taking a break from our regularly unscheduled program, I'm actually going to review a film that just came out. As usual, I have to do a full disclosure: My entire day was planned around Resident Evil stuff. Earlier in the day my fiancé and I went out to buy Resident Evil: Biohazard (a.k.a. Resident Evil 7) and then went to an afternoon showing of Resident Evil: The Final Chapter on its opening day. After that we came home and played Resident Evil 7. I am, by no means, a stranger to either the film or the Capcom franchise, and I am a fan of both. So at the end of this I'm going to give it two review scores: one as a fan, and one as an illegitimate critic that has a blog about crap and talks shit while referencing his penis.
The sixth and final film in the Resident Evil franchise, The Final Chapter picks up at the end of the prior film with the Red Queen contacting Alice and telling here she needs to return to the Hive because there is a cure to the T-Virus. From there we follow Milla Jovovich as she kicks ass from DC to Raccoon City. Seriously, she kills a bunch of dudes while suspended upside down in a snare trap something like 10 minutes in. It's rad as fuck! I'm going to avoid spoilers here as this just came out but there are a ton of action scenes through this whole film. So much so that my fiancé and I both came home with headaches from them. That's how action packed this is. It kicked our asses to the point of being concussed!
With the fanboy section out of the way, I will say that some of The Final Chapter was hilariously over-the-top. Don't get me wrong, I loved it, but there was such a sense of "excess" that if you saw this film with no prior knowledge you would be asking "what the fuck?!" Case in point: Alice has a shotgun with three barrels, or a flash light that is four flashlights taped together or some shit, or there's a scene involving a flaming gasoline waterfall taking out zombies. It looks cool if you remind yourself that these films are (loosely) based on a video game franchise, or if you're an absurd action film fan, but to anyone else it might seem a bit much.
I'm glad that this film was the final one. Not because I have grown tired of them (which I obviously haven't) but because Paul Anderson did a good job of wrapping everything up and not letting it get stale. Milla kicked the fuck out of tons of stuff and was super rad, so kudos to her. Actually, while I mention both of them, before the film started they both came on the screen and thanked the audience for seeing the film and the series. It was kind of cool. So you're welcome Paul and Milla. Hopefully this review makes it okay I use your first names here.
As a fan I give Resident Evil: The Final Chapter 4 out of 5 Umbrella Corp logos:
Looking at this as a sofa critic, I give it 3 out of 5: