Tuesday, June 13, 2017

Most Likely to Die (2015) 1h 30m

I ended up going to see Wonder Woman before coming home and watching this.  That was a mistake.  Not seeing Wonder Woman.  That movie was awesome. But you can't have a steak and then be served bologna and expect it to be the same.

Most Likely to Die is a C-grade movie with D-list actors.  Seriously, Jake Busey?  Perez Hilton?  Get the fuck out with this shit.  The plot is that a bunch of old friends get together for their own celebration before their 10-year reunion.  I don't know what school they went to because the yearbook had all of the seniors listed as a "most likely too..."  We didn't have that.  I also went to a school in the fucking mountains.  I still don't know what kind of school they went to... but I digress... though not really.

Everyone starts dying based on what their "most likely" thing was.  Apparently everyone was a scumbag rich kid asshole and then continued to not quite measure up as an adult.  A murderer dressed in a cap and gown with a paper maché mask is your killer.  The only good thing about this guy is that the mortar board had some razors along the edge which made it like Oddjob's hat.  Between a sweet headbutt/throat slash and a Kung Lao fatality, that cap was the best thing in this film.  The killer was the class clown guy but more out of some psychotic personal guilt thing in relation to the person they bullied all through school.  Then after he's dead a mysterious person dressed in the same outfit steps up and takes the mask from joker's corpse and puts it on.

I hope there isn't a fucking sequel to this.  I would rather watch the Chipmunk movie sequels than another one of these films.  At least those have Jason Lee in them.  Fuckin' Jake Busey... all he does is creep around for like 10 minutes and then gets strangled!

I give Most Likely to Die 1 graduation cap out of 5 only because of the sweet graduation cap kills:

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